May 27, 2007

XXX

After arriving in Boulder for the summer, I felt it necessary to go to King Soopers and buy some sustenance. Boulder tends to be a health conscious city, which can only mean one thing: more flavors of Vitamin Water to choose from.

The stores in Virginia (or more notably The Market) stock themselves full with the more mainstream of the Vitamin Water flavors: you know your 50 cent, focus (the kelly clarkson one), power-c (dragonfruit) and energy (the yellow one). While I usually gravitate toward the 50 cent and the dragonfruit (because I have no idea exactly what a dragonfruit is exactly, except something obviously amazing as indicated by the name), I stumbled upon the oh so delicious acai-blueberry-pomegranate flavor or XXX as it is named.

My love for Vitamin Water started even before I had actually ever had any of the delicious nectar to start with. It started with the Vitamin Water trucks. They are so delightful to the eye, with their line of flavors in color coordination.



But once I actually got my hands on a bottle I realized, not only were they delightful to look at, but they also had witty recaps of the flavors on each bottle. The xxx reads:

c'mon, get your mind out of the gutter. we only named this drink xxx because it has the power of triple antioxidants to keep you healthy and fight free radicals. so in case you're wondering, this does not cost $1.99/minute or contain explicit adult content or anything considered 'uncensored'. it has not 'gone wild!!!' during spring break nor will clips of it be passed around the internet like a certain hotel heiress. and it has never been seen live or nude, but it is definitely au naturale.

I'm not sure how to end this now. perhaps a poll on what I should have ended with:

a. a nudie picture of jenna jameson
b. a link to coupons for FREE burritos
d. a pony picture



3 comments:

paying said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Farrah said...

I am way obsessed with vitamin water in Ohio, and I actually say XXX flavor out here. And in answer to your question, I would want all of the options: a nudie jenna jameson on a pony holding a coupon for a free burrito

w.weston said...

a and b, but not c.